The Product: Rubi Rey Reserve Rum
The Premise: A single barrel finished white rum that’s aged on the coast of northern Puerto Rico and then later filtered for “clarity.”
The Tasters and Their Qualifications: Emily (works at a nursing home, so drinks a lot), Megan (can’t stop drinking), Marcus (“I don’t drink swill, even if it’s free”), Lenny (“I don’t like being sober, I don’t like my life”), Phil (almost finished the “Century Club” once), Tom (“Booze has no memory, and neither do I”)
Total years of legal drinking: 30
The Packaging: An arresting red bottle invokes summertime recollection, but also that creepy kid from “The Shining” running around the hotel yelling “Red Rum!” over and over. Drink at your own risk!
Tasters rated the following on a scale of 1-10, with 1 being “I wouldn’t take it if it was free” and 10 being “I’m heading to the liquor store right now to get my own!”
The Nose: 5.5, hints of licorice and, uh, glue
The Taste: 7.5, warm and sweet, “A new dimension of cool”
Alternate recipe: mixed with Orange Juice, the drink comes to life in an abundance of sweetness (“Superb”)
The Overall Verdict: 7.5, recommended for rum drinkers, goes especially well with Coke, “beats the piss out of your Grandpappy’s gas station swill,” and, however, “Rum is for sissies”
